Sometimes, referring the other side to a neutral information source—or third party—can help bridge the gap. Mediators often are referred to as neutrals. This website is a neutral source. As a mediator, I am an unbiased “Neutral,” and I’m happy to consult for free with anybody considering mediation.

Below is an email that you can use to suggest mediation to a reluctant opposing party.

The most important thing about this email is that it’s short, sweet and not controversial. It doesn’t stir emotions that can cloud rational judgment. If you send an email or letter that sounds combative, that’s going to trigger trouble. This message doesn’t refer to any past transgressions or character flaws or other criticisms. It’s also not condescending. It simply gives information and carries a message about the benefits of mediation—it simply asks the other side to make a rational choice.

Dear ________:

Mediation might benefit us both.

A mediation website I saw today (DougSimpsonMediation.com) has a lot of information about mediation.

• Mediators don’t decide cases like a judge or jury would—the parties decide for themselves, the parties are in control.
• Both sides save money—no depositions, motions, trial work, or experts are necessary.
• We can schedule mediation whenever it’s convenient.
• Attorneys can participate or not, it’s up to us.

The central idea of mediation is to quickly and cheaply resolve disputes, enabling both sides to regain peace of mind while creating a new path forward.

The choice is ours; it is not being forced on either of us. It’s voluntary— a central feature of mediation.

When you have a chance, you might check out that site (or other mediation sites). Even if we don’t agree on the substance of the dispute, maybe we can agree that we would both like to save money, time, and move on. Maybe mediation is a way to go forward.

This site has a lot of information. The mediator is neutral and gives free consultations.

What do you think?

Thanks.